A Miracle

19 days ago my mother went into the hospital to have a reversal of her ileostomy.
(In August her bowels had perforated and the doctors had to do an emergency surgery to remove 8 inches of her large intestines. She was given an ileostomy bag for 6 weeks so her bowels could heal.)
The reversal surgery almost took my dear mothers life. The surgery had caused her small intestines to perforate. The doctors did not know this until 7 days after the surgery. My sweet mother suffered mentally, emotionally, and physically for one week before they went in and did another surgery to discover the problem. Her bowels were leaking into her body, spreading infection throughout her belly. As the doctor described it, "it was like a bomb went off in her belly." 2 more inches were removed from her small intestines and another ileostomy was given. My mother spent 5 days in critical condition in the Intensive Care Unit fighting off the infection that was rampant in her body. Another 7 days were spent in the hospital gaining enough strength to walk and eat again, healing from 2 surgeries in 1 week, and dealing with pneumonia. My mother is alive and now 19 days later she is home.
The rocky road is not over yet. She will have to gain strength and return to full health before she will have another reversal surgery.

Those are the facts...now here are my feelings. (Warning: this is more of a journal entry than a blog post).

On Wednesday the 23rd I visited my mother the day after her reversal surgery. I really believed she was fine and that she would be home in a few days. The doctors had said the surgery went perfectly and all they were waiting for were bowel sounds to prove the surgery had worked. I was inundated with things in my life (preschool, the kids, super Saturday, etc). I'd help mom when she got home. Oh! What a selfish and naive attitude!

On Saturday the 26th my grandma came to my house to babysit my kids. She insisted that I needed to go to the hospital because my mother was very sick. I knew she was having a hard time, but I was not prepared to see my mother on death's door. When I first saw her, her face and her voice reminded me of Grandpa Wayne's when I last saw him. I had to go in the hall so I could compose myself before I went back into the room. My mom was so sick. I slept at the hospital that night so my dad could go home to sleep. The night went pretty well. My mom talked in her sleep about my kids, flying cockroaches, horses, etc. which I just chalked up to the reaction she was having to the pain killers.

On Sunday the 27th, my brother Mike came from New York. He was worried about her and worked with her all day on her breathing to improve the pneumonia and walking so she could stimulate the bowel sounds. That evening we took the kids to see Grandma Kathleen. They loved seeing her and she reacted so cute to seeing them. She'd had a pretty good day...maybe things would be better tomorrow?

That night I was awaken at 2 a.m., with a phone call from my mother, who was very distraught and very confused. She insisted that I call my brothers and my dad and come immediately to the hospital. That night my mother suffered hell. My dad and I did everything we could to calm her down and help her sleep and rid her of the nightmares. We had no idea that infection was racking her body, we just thought it was a reaction to the medication.

Monday, my brother Jefferson came from Las Vegas. My aunt Amy got a flight from California. That day several tests were done to determine what was the cause of her illness. Why was she not getting better? Why was she acting so confused and anxious? That evening the doctors decided that she needed another surgery to remove her gall bladder and to do an exploratory surgery to figure out what was wrong. That evening my brothers and I sat in the hospital waiting room and prayed for my mother's life. We prayed for my father's strength and we prayed for comfort. That night, President Adamson (my mother's stake president) gave her the most inspired and beautiful blessing I have ever heard. This trial that my dear mother was going through, was not for her. It was for us. This trial would bring my family together and solidify our relationships and that we would learn lessons from it. In the blessing it expressed gratitude for my mother willing to endure this trial so that we might learn the lessons that we needed. I have held onto this blessing and have tried to learn the lessons that I needed so that my wonderful mother could be done with this trial! This day was one of the hardest I have ever endured. I was exhausted, worried, hopeful, and totally reliant upon my Lord.

On Tuesday, September 29th at 6:30 a.m. mom went into surgery. It was here they found the perforation and the raging infection. I thank the Lord they found it and were able to save her life. She was so sick.

The next few days I watched my mother suffer terribly. It was so hard to see her in pain and fighting for her life. My brothers were so good with her. They kept up amazing strength and "can do" attitudes. I tried to be strong but it was very difficult for me. I can't even begin to express how glad I was that my brothers were there to help. My father continued to be a pillar of strength. You should have seen the love and concern he had for my mother. He was willing to do anything he needed to in order to save her life. He was under considerable pressure and yet he did everything out of love for my mother. He is an amazing man. I still don't know how he is surviving on a few hours of sleep a night.

Progress was made. Jefferson and I were with her during her first physical therapy. She cried throughout the whole thing and yet she pushed forward. She kept her eyes on the sign I'd made her of our family motto, "Do your best" and she did! She has inspired so many people to do their best and now, in the toughest circumstances she was doing her best while still on death's doorstep. My mother is amazing!

My mom is home now. Oh, how I missed her. I love my mom so much and she is everything to me. She helps me in so many ways and it just wasn't the same going to bed without having exchanged events of our days.

I know with every ounce of my being that my mother's life was preserved by the many prayers that were offered in her behalf. She has touched so many people's lives and really has changed the world. All those people prayed and the combined effort saved my mother. I am grateful for this experience so that I could learn how powerful our Father in Heaven is and how much he desires to help us. He has a plan. My brother Ryan and I had a wonderful moment when he shared with me that I needed to have faith that even if my mother was taken that I would see her again. I know this. I just am really glad that that plan includes me getting my mother to be with me for awhile more, and my children to have her as a grandmother.

I have also been so blessed to have wonderful friends that supported me in this trial. I have had to drop my kids off at neighbors and friends who cared and loved them through the hard days. Many meals have feed my family while I was at the hospital. Kind phone calls and messages have lifted me and reminded me that there are people who care. I love you dear friends.

My family has been strengthened and solidified through this trial. I love my dad and my brothers more than ever. I love my dear sister in laws. My grandma is amazing, I've never seen such devotion! My aunts and uncle have been unwavering. We all agree, my mother is the center of our family. We need her and we love her! I love you dear fam!

Most of all I have to thank my dear husband who has been a single dad the past two weeks. He has been so supportive and kind throughout this trial. He has held me as I cried, prayed with me, planned and prepared lessons for me because I had to still teach preschool, and allowed me to be with my mom. He is a wonderful man. He reminds me so much of my own father. I know that if I ever had to endure what my mother has gone through, he would be right by my side life my father has done with my mom. I love you Chris....even more today than ever!